While debating whether or not I should take a digital detox, I scrolled too far down my own instagram feed (admit it; you do it too from time to time.) Instagram became my second journal when I wasn’t looking, a more polished version of the thoughts that constantly run through my mind. Some of these words still feel tender and urgent, even now. Once, in the comfort of my bed, a little sleepy, the real world still a few minutes away, they brought me solace. I hope they make you feel a kind of way too.
In a world that prides itself in saying no, I have gotten this far by saying yes: yes to a trip to Miami with three girls I had never met before; yes to applying for a job I never, in a million years, thought I’d be qualified for; yes to a spontaneous solo trip to New York; yes to visiting my best friend in Tennessee when I barely had money to buy food; yes to dinner, to concerts, to movies, all by myself; yes to skipping art class to meet a friend I had only ever spoken to online… the best moments of my life have been the least expected ones, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Like that Jim Carrey movie, here’s to always saying yes to lifeOctober 18, 2018
earlier in the week I took part of something that rattled me to the core, and I can’t stop thinking about it. my words may get lost in this big ol’ platform, but I hope that you read this, and you remember: ❤July 18th, 2018
we only get one body–one amazing, marvelous body–and the least we can do is take good care of it. love it by giving it good, nutritious foods, and adequate sleep, and plenty of exercise and clean air. all those good things our ancestors did that we have forgotten about. this amazing vessel allows us to experience the universe and we so often neglect it for reasons that, at the end of the day, dont matter all that much. but this one body is the only one we have. aren’t we, after all, created in God’s image? then why do we keep neglecting His greatest creation? ❤
I can’t stop thinking about it, to be honest. All I can do is be better with myself. For myself
November 10th, 2018
There are times when I am going about my day, when suddenly time stops, for just a moment, and I am so painfully aware of my own existence: my hand wrapped around a mug of coffee, eyelids still a little heavy with sleep. My skin vibrates with unspent energy. For a few precious seconds I am so present and so beautifully alive, and nothing matters. I cease to be a person and become one more dot in this unbelievable, beautiful thing we call Universe… And then, as quickly as it came, the feeling leaves me and I turn again into a woman who has work meetings and doctor appointments, and other little tidbits that constitute a life.
Today I finally got to relax in the most luxurious manner I could think of: drinking a fantastic prosecco while taking a bath in beautiful, turquoise water 🍷And as the warm water turned my body into a pile of mush my questions went into the philosophical…. is this good prosecco? what makes a prosecco taste good? how do you determine what the best prosecco out there tastes like? will I ever get to drink prosecco in an Italian vineyard? did this prosecco even come from Italy? (answer: yes) is this bathbomb that has been sitting in the trunk of my car for over a year going to give me a rash? .June 17th, 2018
these and many other questions, well never know the answers of…
Last night I had a dream in which an Instagram famous influencer and an Etsy seller fell madly in love and the entire internet exploded and everyone had an opinion about it and it was like this whole Romeo and Juliet thing, but with more fake flowers and crystals and sunsets at the beach. The whole thing was so ridiculous I woke up at 3am laughing.April 21st, 2018
Fun date idea: you take me out for drinks and light conversation over dinner… Then I ditch you because I have a really good book waiting for me at home 🏃🏽♀️👋May 25th, 2018
Here’s to the nights spent agonizing over whether or not I was good enough. To the long talks with friends about anything and everything. To the evenings with my dad when he told me I was meant to do great things and I didn’t believe him. To buying that overpriced cup of coffee, that weekend flight, that skirt, just because you could. To spontaneous car rides with with your oldest friends. Here’s to new beginnings and hopes for a better future, and to a life I’m extremely thankful for.February 13th, 2018
March 22nd, 2018
If I could go back and tell something to the old me, the one who laid awake at night with so many questions, the one who was too scared of cutting off all her hair and book that solo trip, who didn’t think she deserved the good things coming her way, it’d be this: chin up love, no one knows what the eff is going on. We’re just blindly going around this madly spinning rock, hoping we will get it right by the end. And that’s a beautiful thing, really.
I am all about romanticizing slow Sunday mornings, when the city lazily stretches its sleepy bones and time freezes in between sips of your coffee. Just for a moment, bleary eyed and a little soft around the edges, sunshine rays over your sleep-warm skin, you are the only person in the universe.September 16th, 2018
“…. You ain’t no blushing flower, darling, but something ancient and strong. So bloom, tall and wide, so alive Nature has no choice but to wrap herself around you.” Excerpts from a book I will never write in a small museum of Paris, 2018September 22nd, 2018